Yes, this is how it has to be, I reassured myself after getting my new wardrobe collections. I spent hours rearranging the new set of clothes. Added to those were my collection of nail paints, glosses, and lipsticks. And of course, a couple of new foot wears too. I even thought of new haircut to suit those new collections. But soon after just one month, the new collections protruded my belly. How could it go this worse, I wondered in such a short span of time? But then, I could reason out, it was my growing years that had added up to my weight. My cheeks too had become chubby and my arms bulkier. With a lot of difficulties, I had to accept myself as there was no option left. For the next few days, I went through all the exercises of tummy crunches. I managed for a week making sure doing those crunches.
As I looked at myself in the mirror one morning during a midday light, to be precise, with the curtain of my room slid wide open to let sunlight more than required, I could see my grey hair popping out from my mid partition. Those needed to be coloured. Dark brown is my brand to make it look natural. Yes, I had forgotten to dye due to my new routine in my day. My planned activity of dying my hair for the next day had something added to it, ‘the parents’ teacher’s meeting’. And quite obviously, my priority took a back seat. The stressed meeting brought in another set of activities for my daily routine. My teenager kids needed to be monitored. One was an over smart child and had to be under strict vigilance. And the other, for academics. New rules were set for both. And of course, a new evening routine added with some extra time to talk to the hard-hit teenagers and know the events of their day. And an interview with PepsiCo CEO, Ms. Indra Nooyi now comes on my mind, where she had mentioned, even the spouse turns to be a teenager with teenager kids. Damn true! Those were the words of my life! How could it be a coincidence?
My weekend day, Saturdays were exclusively dedicated to my spouse. And Sundays for kids. Another forgotten responsibility looms, a responsibility is taken for granted, a talk with my mom. Guilt fills in me. I take an oath of calling her every day, no matter what comes my way.
And then, me being wise, I divided, the weekdays and adjusted my daily routines. From online bill payment to vacuum cleaning and dusting, from calling mom and siblings to my friends. From going easy on cooking to prioritizing kids. Yes, there I was, on cloud nine, managing all the responsibilities and handling everything so maturely. My three teenage kids, and my overgrown another teenager (spouse) and yet another dominating and emotional blackmailing teenager (my mom) are my worlds and nothing else. Nothing else. The realization hits me hard. Struggling with facts, I come to terms, the spiritual path is one path that can show me my path for peace.
Is this life after 40? If I look back, it just started cool and slow down soon after my 30. Wish, I could be young again and knew or understood to accept these facts of life. I have to keep the ball rolling and to do so, I need to be young again. To be young, I need to be an ardent student with a zeal for learning. And yes, I have been so. I took up a tough and creative lesson, a challenge to challenge myself! And that is what I felt, is required to live a life of passion with compassion.
Seems to relate to your life? Then, pick up my book, ‘A Drop of Dew’ and savour. It’s available on Amazon, Flipkart etc. Be sure, you can revisit your life and add some joy to it. After all, life is meant to be lived. No regrets and no complaints! Right?
Do share your piece of life that you felt was a changing node.