Health issues of adopted children, both mental and physical is of great concern.
The development of the child begins with the fetus development in the mother’s womb. Apart from the genetic endowment, it is also the nutrition and the mental condition of the mother during and before pregnancy that counts. How often have we come across the elders in the family insisting a pregnant woman on reading spiritual books, listening to soft music and watching soothing pictures?
The three aspects of the brain development are intelligence, personality, and emotional well-being. It is through the mother the baby is fed. The kick, the little heart beats seen through the scanning and the moves of the baby inside the womb is such a pleasure to a mother, be it the first child or the last. It is the joy of the entire family. No sooner, the baby is born; it becomes the apple of the eye in the family. The facial features the baby shares with its family members is adorable, be it the tiny nose or the little chubby cheeks. Parents can go to any extent for the precious treasure.
However, not all the kids have the blessings to be born in a loving family. There are infants growing in an unsure womb environment, who are destined for adoption. The result in such a situation is a child born with a weak mind, emotionally unstable. The effect continues until the lifetime of the child, affecting the child in every stage of its development.
Some of the common problems faced by adopted children:
- Feeling of loss and abandonment throughout their lives
- Attachment problems
- Delayed milestones
- Slow learners
- Damaged self-esteem
- Mild mental disorders
- A depressed, unmotivated child
- Develop social, intellectual and emotional problems
On the contrary, the child also has unique traits that can help overcome the difficulties, if addressed properly. It is the caretaker or the adoptive parents who can come to the rescue of the child. Just as everything comes in packages, adoption too has its own positives and negatives. As the very definition of adoption goes, it is a lifetime commitment to support and nurture the child. The commitment to adoption starts the moment the child arrives home and it is for sure an enjoyable journey if one embraces it.
Unfortunately, some of the adoption cases fail because of the expectations of the adoptive parents from an adopted child. Unable to understand the underlying problems in a child, the expectations are set excessively high. However, arming with information and integrating flexibility in parenting can make one from an ordinary parent to an extraordinary parent.
No one size fits all. Continuous working on new strategies is a requisite. Patience, perseverance, and reinforcement are the new mantra. Being imperfect is the new cool in parenting style today, especially when it comes to adopted children and teenagers.
If you are a parent of an adopted child or wish to pursue adoption, keep in mind that it is or was your conscious decision of adopting a child and now it is your responsibility. Just as you are struggling, your child too is struggling to find its place.
With your support, the child can fit in the family well and can truly live a happy life.