Five effective steps to forgive someone who has hurt you

Each one of us at one point in time in our lives faces the deadliest betrayal. It may be by a spouse, children, or someone who we care about the most. Gripping on to the bitter grudge, we live through the painful days, missing out on the little day-to-day happiness. Over a period of time, the feelings of resentment dominate us taking the complete charge of our life. Hence, it is important to let go of the bitter feelings for those who has hurt us.

Here are the five effective steps that can help you forgive someone who has hurt you:

  1. By being patient and give yourself some time
    Under the simple strategy – life comes with ebbs and flows. Just as the two sides of a coin, happy days follows sad days and vice versa. Nothing is permanent. Everything that comes has to pass. The passing days and nights heals our emotions. Go with the flow and change with the changing times. Making up your mind is the first important step you have to take.
  2. Detach yourself from the situation
    As days pass on, time heals your emotions. It is now your mind is open and you are able to consider other important aspects of life, maybe catching up with your friends or working on your goals. Eventually, your diversion of mind changes your perspective. Go back to that situation and think from your significant other’s perspective.
  3. Do a little of contemplation
    Accept the fact that change is constant. You need to change with your changing times. The sooner the better, it is for you. Life taught you great lessons. It mellowed and matured you. You have more strength and courage to face adversities now. More choices and opportunities are before you. With the lesson learnt, you can never make the mistake again. Reflect on the situation and you will realize, your reaction to the situation could have been different. It time to let go off your ill feelings. Move away from your role as victim and come out of your grip.
  4. Consider the effects and benefits of forgiving
    Forgiving and letting go of grudges and bitterness paves way for happiness, health, and peace. Forgiving is not excusing. Forgiving is to allowing yourself to step forward to a higher level than your significant other. You can always start a new and healthier relationship. Forgiving moves you ahead. If you are unforgiving, you lose valuable and enriching connectedness with others.
  5. Be the new you
    Forgiving is not forgetting the one you who has hurt you. Now that you have the control you can always work to get that loved significant back into your life. It can also be the other way round, by forgiving you proved to yourself that you are able to handle life better. Go for a better option the next time. Keep in mind that relationship navigates through phases. And it needs to be nurtured to keep it going.

The bottom line, forgiveness is a conscious decision to let go of the revenge we hold towards the person who hurt us. To forgive, it takes a lot of courage. Embracing forgiveness is to embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy.  Above all, it gives you a new freedom.

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